Introverts may not enjoy crowds at clubs after a certain point in time, and you might get bored in situations with low social requirements. Whether it's browsing stores, walking around interesting areas, traveling together, playing video games, taking in films, or just pursuing different interests while physically in the same space, it's good to compromise.It can be tricky to see an introvert's sit-quietly time as fun if you're the kind of person who gets bored and itchy after six minutes.If you date an introvert and go to parties together, you're going to need a game plan.
Leaving them alone to get other things done is perfectly fine; don't feel the need to baby them or treat them like an invalid.
Dating can seem like a challenge for introverted women.
This is a massive relief to me: not only am I introverted, I'm also a little socially anxious. How much quiet time do they need before they're up and ready to talk to people again?
He never makes me feel bad about it, and after I greet the person I'm free to go. What particularly tires them out (small talk, heated passionate conversations, big groups)?
It's also not a personal attack on you or your love.
When you've been together with an introvert for a long time, you can become part of their social recharging, rather than a drain on it (this can take years, but it happens).
This can be one of the trickier things to negotiate in an introvert relationship: their quiet time is deeply necessary for their internal social batteries, but it doesn't have to mean they're isolated. So don't deliberately leave your partner at home while you go to parties or gatherings because you think they won't enjoy them, or be surprised when they want to host a party; introverts get lonely too!
You can bond just as well, and feel just as connected, by being quiet in the same room — or, indeed, letting them be quiet and read in the next chair while you chat on Skype. And even extroverts can have their quiet moments; it's very rare to be entirely one category or the other.
(My mates know this well, and it's pretty common knowledge that during parties — which I love hosting, by the way — I'll often quietly disappear for ten minutes to recharge a bit.) Apparently this match-up between introverts and extroverts is fairly common, and it brings out the best in both of us.
If you're in the position of being an extrovert dating an introvert, here are eight tips that should keep both of you happy.
Until then, try not to regard their need for withdrawal as a reflection on the relationship, lashing out at your friends, rudeness, or anything other than what it is: self-care.